Nolan is ONE!

How is my baby one year old? It was just like yesterday he was legit flying into this world.

Last weekend we had Nolan’s first birthday. It was a truck themed party because that kid could play with a truck all day long and be completely content. My parents flew in from Ohio to celebrate and help get the house ready for his shindig. I vowed to not overdo it. I didn’t want to have a big ordeal, with tons of food and balloons and everything. Lol I actually laughed as I finished typing that.  I even was going to BUY a cake. Too bad Publix wanted $140 for the cake that I made in 2 hrs. Hard pass publix, hard pass.

Of course, I ended up going overboard. Here is the table spread that we had. Definitely, overboard. I tried to incorporate most of his favorite foods…veggie straws, donuts (don’t judge me), meatballs, and buffalo chicken dip…you know the normal 1-year old fare.

Last minute, one of our close friends mentioned that she had a bounce house if we wanted to use it. Ummm hell yes, I want to use it! It was close to 70 degrees, so it was perfect for the older littles to go and burn off some energy. Nolan was semi unimpressed because he kept falling everywhere.

Everyone came and sang and watched Nolan semi smash his cake. We played, ate and visited with friends. Needless to say, it was another great birthday and my main dude was perfect. Happy first birthday Nolan! You make my heart so happy!

Do Great Things

Lindsey

8 Month Catch Up

This is my promise to get back into blogging. Its been 8 months since my last post about throwing in the towel with BFing and moving strictly to pumping. What a journey that was. Lots have happened in the last 8 months. Ready for the recap? 

June:

Based off of the last post, something was going on with Nolan eating. We went to the allergist to see what the deal was. Dude got all the back pricks to see if he was allergic to dairy like I suspected. He wasn’t allergic but was sensitive to it along with cats and dogs….Anyone want two cats?? They are cuddlers and lovers. Free for nothing.

Summer:

Aubin is quite the busy woman. She did baseball with her friend Eli all summer and truly this picture makes my softball loving heart explode. The stance, the look, my God she is so cool.

She also started doing gymnastics at Wake Gymnastics. Those girls are hella no joke. She is becoming quite the Simon Biles. Too bad she cant figure out if she wants to do cartwheels right handed or left. We will get there. 

Aubs also started Crossfit. She looks forward to class every Sunday and loves working out with miss Rachael. I find her doing squats and burpees at the most random times. It's fantastic to show her that working out is fun and not a punishment for eating something. Look out CrossFit games 2030!

October:

This month was insane to all of us. I accepted a new job at Cisco as a Program Manager and I have never been happier. The team is amazing and really making a difference in both the company and in the real world. The culture of the organization is such a perfect fit for me and my family…flexible, trusting, and truly caring of what their employees are doing.

Because of the new job, it pushed baby Nono's surgery up 2 months to get it completed under my old insurance (I already hit my deductible with having a baby in Feb.) WHAT? NOLAN HAD SURGERY? Yeah, he did. I'm sure he would not want it blasted all over the internet on what procedure he had, so I will keep that to our family. He went in like a champion and the whole ordeal was harder on Levi and me than it was on him. He seemed perfectly fine about 3 days post op. My little trooper dude.

Halloween: get on this level. Aub was OBSESSED with watching The Magic School Bus. Like OBSESSED. So what did she want to be for Halloween? Miss Frizzle. Fantastic sister lets do that. I get her a dress from @KPeaOrigional and bought a $25 Liz the Lizard Purse. We made a damn school bus out of the wagon. This little, special, amazing, super perfect, tiny adult decides 2 days before Halloween that she isn’t down for Miss Frizzle, and wants to be a Super monster. Sorry Charlie.

December: It's Christmas. No family in town just us as a family of 4. Just the way I like it.

We had been kicking around the idea of buying a new home and getting into a new school district for Aubin who will be moving to kindergarten in 17 months!!!! Praise be. So we pulled the trigger on building a new house in Apex. I have never been so excited. We have picked out all of our options and everything and now we wait for long build! We have a tentative move in of September!! More to come on that as the house goes up! If you have any tips for building let me know!

Do great things

Lindsey

Making Baby Fat Rolls Appear

Keep you baby fed

Breast is best

FED is best

Who the hell cares how your kid eats as long as they eat?

One thing for sure is feeding Mr. Nolan may be one of the most challenging parts of having a newborn. This was all such uncharted territory for me because Aubin ate like she had never seen food before for 17 months. In the world of breast-feeding, 17 months is an eternity. I just expected things would be easy with Nolan.

We started off okay but quickly learned that he would rather shake his head side to side for hours rather than eat. Okay then dude, take a bottle of boob milk because you’re hangryyyy. Phew-he drank from the bottle with ease.

Then we realized that he has some crazy rash happening that was a bit more aggressive than baby acne. First thing to go (via pediatrician) is the milk protein for this mama. Excellent- now he won’t nurse and I can’t eat Cookout Milkshakes. FML. Thankfully, within a week his face cleared up so dairy free is the way to be. 

While all this dairy free shit was happening we tried off an on straight up breastfeeding and finally after some research I got a nipple shield. This little plastic piece is sent from Satan himself. It is flimsy, clear plastic that attracts every prince of dirt/hair/nastiness that your home has to offer. It’s awful but you know what Nolan seemed to do better with it. I however was at my wits end with it. It falls off, it’s always upstairs when you need it down stairs, and who the hell has time to clean that thing in between feedings? Did I mention I don’t know when I brushed my teeth last??

One day one of my good friends came over to drop off dinner for us and she mentioned that she thought he had a tongue tie. Great. So I made an appointment and we were referred to a pediatric ENT. She did the frenulum snip right in the office and I thought we were ready to roll.

Negative.

I gave it the old college try for 2 weeks and finally there in the towel. Bro you can take a bottle. I just can’t - I’m sorry.

So now we rock the bottles and I am a pumping machine. Due to pumping so much I have been able to build up a HUGE stock of milk. I have over 4 GALLONS of no dairy milk and I was able to give over a gallon of frozen milk with dairy to one of my Girlfriends who is having twins. We have so much milk that we had to purchase a garage refrigerator!!

Kids are so weird. Just when you think you know why you’re doing they throw a 90 mile an hour curveball at your head. Here’s to making fat rolls appear on this baby man of mine.

Do Great Things

Linds

The Ease of Having Two Little People

This if a fake title.

I figure that I should write about the differences between Nolan and Aubin because, well there are many. I feel like we are in such different places now with number two than we were with number one. I wouldn't say things are easier, we are just more laid back than we were the first time. I guess we know what to expect, that the baby will be just fine, and his head isn't going to pop off. Here are what I believe are some of the reasons why we are doing well. 

Happy wife happy life right!? That goes for a mom too I suppose. I went back to the gym well before my six weeks (I have since been cleared to workout). Here is where you keep your opinions to yourself. This call was made not to lose the mom body but for my "mental fitness." After everything I went through Postpartum wise with Aubs, I knew “moving” helped my anxiety more than anything. Plus sides: keeping my gym routine, grownup interaction and getting me out of the house enough to NOT go to target every day. My mantra for this maternity leave is "me first." I need to take care of myself, and everything will fall in line--and it has for the most part.

When Target sends you a onesie you take obnoxious pictures 

His cries don’t crush me to my soul like Aubins did. If I come home from the gym and need to take a shower. He can cry for 3 minutes while I clean the funk off. He will be fine.

Life is easier when you say yes than no. You want to have marshmallows and chocolate milk for breakfast? Sounds pretty balanced to me. Have at it sister. Bubble guppies and tracing paper for the millionth time to keep you occupied, sure thing. You wanna wear that outfit-cool-you look homeless so at least let me fix your hair. Don’t get me wrong she does eat protein and reads like LeVar Burton but most things are not worth the fight.

  

Sleep “training” is different/easier/more planned this time around. I try my damnedest to follow a babywise schedule during the day and that carries over into the night. Aubin didn’t sleep through the night until 13 months and my body physically cannot do that this time. Levi and I split the work thwith Nolan (he takes the 11pm dreamfeed and I do the 3 am real feed) which was something that I completely would not let him do last time. Breastfeeding was our time-night or day.

Breastfeeding is SO MUCH HARDER this time. I suspect Nolan has a lip tie and we’re going to get it checked out. I would say 60% of the time he is bottle fed because of ease and the lack of fight I need to put into it. This has allowed my frozen milk stash to grow exponentially because I am super lucky to be a quick pumper that produces a ton. We already have two gallons of milk frozen at the 6 week point. (If you or someone you know is looking to get rid of a stand up garage freezer, please Jesus let me know!) Also, we just realized he has a sensitivity to milk--poor dudes face was all blotched up. Now that I have cut dairy, it is so much better. 

This is a 5 day difference of ingesting milk protein vs none 

Taking help this time is an absolute yes. You want to make/bring us dinner or lunch? Yes. You want to take Murphy for a walk? Yes. You want to babysit? Yes. I love you all and will accept allllll the help. With that being said, I have not gotten around to writing thank you notes and honestly, it’s probably not going to happen at this point (all good Southern women are gasping at the thought, everyone from Ohio is saying Yeah, that makes sense lol) here is your shout out for being amazing. We would probably not have eaten if it was not for you amazing people!! 

The Struzyks, The Brewers, Carol, Cat, Phelicia, The Williams, The O'hares,  The Swinneys, dustin&jess, rachel/Jenn/katie, The Coles, The Griggs, Steph Herrera, The Tornows, Kayla, Kathleen, MB, The McKee’s, Sabrina and Christian, Patricia and Charles, Nay and Sarah, The Rossos, Amy, both mine and Levis Work, Kim and Mech, The Blake’s---Love you allllllll

***If I forgot you please don’t take offense, I’m writing this at 3am with my left hand, and kid eating off me**

Do great things

Lindsey

Nolan's Birth Story -- Fast and Furious

Wouldn't it be nice if this was how babies showed up at your house?? Just skip being pregnant and huge, and you open the door to a sweet little baby muffin?? Yeah, me too.

Feb 3

Contractions started at 6am. Super light no real pain but def something. We laid around until 7:30 and I cuddled Aubin knowing it could be our last morning cuddles with her as an only child.

I sent Levi and Aubin to soccer as normal and began tracking things closer. Contractions were still super light but around 5 mins apart. I called the nurse line and she told me to go in because it was my second child even though I could talk through the contraction. 

Selfie on the way to have a baby

We of course had to make a pit stop at harbor freight because “It’s on the way Linds!!!” Seriously, my husband is a peach right?? This was when I started to notice less contractions. We finished up returning the air compressor and went to the hospital. Now nothing was really happening. I changed into my gown and they tossed the monitors on. We were there a total of 46 minutes and I had 2 contractions. The Doctor came in and after checking me said well, you’re still 3cm and 50% (which is what I was on the previous Monday) so we are going to send you home until things get much stronger. Cool.

We made the walk of shame out of the hospital. I went home, ate a donut and took a nap. Apparently, God wanted to give me the chance to take cute hospital pictures because He knew that shit wasn’t going to happen when I really went into labor.

The hospital gown my mom made
for my deliveries with Aubs and Nolan

Feb 5

Me: What the hell was that thump? Damn dude just KICKED me hard. What time is it?? 3:36, cool 3 more hours to sleep. Wait that wasn’t a kick, that was my water breaking! “Hey Levi, umm my water broke. I’m going to hop in the shower and then straighten my hair.” “Call Holly, have her come over Linds” “Levi, chill out we have time.” Famous last words right there.

I realized that we “didn’t have time” about half way through straightening my hair. My contractions were wicked crazy and shit got REAL stupid fast. To the point that I couldn’t move, talk or do anything during them. Thank God Holly came over right away to stay with Aubin. We left for the hospital around 4:40am as I was kneeling on the front seat, huddled over the back of the chair, yelling to Levi that we could quite possibly have a baby in the car.

We got to the hospital at 5:05 where I threw my ID and insurance card at the registration lady. Please just take me to Labor and Delivery people. Im shaking and making stupid noises and I can’t sit. I don’t have time to “check in” we can do this later you twats.

Around 5:20 I was in my delivery room. I immediately told them to call Anesthesia so I could get an epidural---they laughed at me and said well we need to get this IV in and pump some fluid into you first. Well get on it Karen, I’m dying. The Doctor checked me and I was 5 cm. The IV went in and all I could do was hold on to Levi every single contraction, shake, and sweat. There was SO MUCH SWEAT. The nurse checked me 10 minutes later (because I seemed to be in a LOT of pain) and I was 9 cm. Cool 5cm-9cm in 10 mins---no wonder I want to die.

Finally, around 6am the anesthesiologist came in and began her work. Two sticks to numb the area—okay Linds you got this—get it together Linds. Homegirl can’t put something in your SPINE when you are moving all over. Try 1—nope—try 2 – nope. “Honey, you need to stay still. Please stop shaking” “Fuck off Levi” Try 3—nope.

The anesthesiologist: “Lindsey, I can try one more time, but you HAVE TO stop moving. I keep hitting bone.”

Me: “F it, let’s have a baby now.”

Anesthesiologist: “Good call because this would not take by the time you have this baby anyway.”

I flip back to all fours. (which for some reason was the only semi comfortable position during this whole entire labor) “Lindsey, do you want to lay on your back to do this???” “Fuck off Levi” “Okay we are doing this on all fours.”

No one was ready but me. One contraction, and two pushes later, Nolan Marshall Johnson came into this world at 6:21 am. 2 hours and 45 minutes after my water broke. Fast and Furious with no pain medication. Not at all how we planned it to go but absolutely perfect in its own way.

 

The most perfect meme I have ever read

This kid is the bees knees. He is so squishy and wonderful. I can't even get enough of him. Everyone is in love with him---even Aubin!!

Do great things

Linds

Christmas Time with the Johnsons

Typically, Christmas is my least favorite season. A hatred past down from my mother due to cold Ohio winters and schlepping around tons of decoration crap from the attic for only a short period of time. However, I cant help but let my heart get full watching Aubin come downstairs the day after thanksgiving and seeing the house decorated and festive.

This child loves Christmas lights and will take every opportunity to see them. Her little smile gets gigantic when she is in a store and the Christmas section comes up. Look at how pumped she was for her gingerbread house! I cannot wait to make gallons of cookies with her and let her make a huge mess with flour and then we can eat everything.

How can you not love it when a kid climbs right up on Santa’s lap and says “I want Moana and toys.” She is very decisive. Moana and toys. That is it. 

The holiday and Aubins spirit is helping with mine as well. Her joy is infectious and she is now so excited about her baby brother. She has named him Maui and likes to help pick out his clothes so he can be fashionable like her. 

Both Levi and myself have come a long way since the post about antepartum. We have seen a therapist and both have made amazing strides for our growing family. The babies room is painted and is coming along rather well. A few pieces of wall décor have been made for his “Where the Wild Things Are” bedroom. We have started to get his clothes ready and put up all the essentials.

He is a mover and a shaker for sure. Our last baby appointment the Doctor gave me the “Hummmm, hummmm, ????”  because my belly was measuring 33 weeks and I am only at 30 weeks gestation. We had to have an ultrasound to check that my placenta previa moved so we also checked to see what the baby was really measuring. Of course, he was 33 weeks. Look at little dudes dimple—gahhh I cant wait to see that in real life! Fatty fat fat checks. 

Time to get our asses in gear for this kid to come. Aubs was 10 days early so I am anxious to see when Baby J #2 comes---especially if he is growing like a weed. 

Do great things
Linds

Thank you, everyone

I want to take a moment and say thank you to everyone that has reached out to me in the last day. I am always in awe over the response from controversial posts like the one yesterday or the previous postpartum blog. Everyone has a story or some thing that they could contribute.

Its all about standing out. 

Thank you to the teddy bear of a man that let me cry on his shoulder in the supply closet as I was hiding at work.

Thank you to anyone who shared a personal story via fb, pm, or text. I appreciate your experience, thoughts and your wisdom.

Thank you to the girl I haven't spoken to since college. I appreciate your outlook that he may grow up to be whomever he wants to be. Boy, girl, transgender, or anything he wants. The different perspective was what I needed.

Thank you world for the Scary Mommy post about the bond between moms and their boys. Thank you Big Bang Theory for the show on gender disappointment. The universe is serendipitous like that.

Thank you to Levi, Aubin and Baby J. You all dont know what you mean to me. Thank you for being so patient and understanding. Aubs-thanks for the cuddles yesterday and the great Moana adventure last night :)

Lastly, To the people that may not fully understand how someone can feel the way I do, thank you. You may, or may not have reached out but I thank you because everyone is struggling with something and we all need to be there for each other.

That last sentence is worth repeating. Everyone is struggling with something. My issues do not devalue what may be affecting you in your life, and vise versa. Everyone should understand we are all fighting something regardless of how big or small an issue is to you. It shouldn't matter what is happening in your life, someone else may facing THEIR biggest issue on the same day. Be kind because you don't know, nor can you tell a person how to feel--regardless of how you think they should be feeling.

Again, thank you all for the kind words, the hugs, texts, and prayers!!! So today I will brush my shoulders off like Miss A. and make it a good day.

Do great things
Linds