I'm Just Not Ready

I’m not ready. Plain and simple, I’m just not ready. The mere thought of leaving Aubin just makes me sick to my stomach. I never really thought that I would be one of those moms who would actually consider staying home. Too bad that is not in the cards for us right now.

Corporate America and their maternity leave is basically a joke. I was fortunate enough to receive 44.5% of my pay over the course of my 12 week absence—for which I am SUPER grateful. However, some women are not that lucky. This infographic shows how the US stacks up to the rest of the world.

Take a minute to let that sink in to your brain. At least companies like Johnson and Johnson and Google are taking steps to mitigate the short maternity leave that women receive…Don’t even get me started on paternity leave. I’m obviously upset because, I am NOT ready.

Now the time has come and I have to go back to work to help support our family. I have to leave my baby at this place that I will call “school” to make myself feel better. She will have fun, learn, and have little tiny people friends. All things that are awesome for her, but super sad for this mommy. I want to teach her things, and see her roll over for the first time. I want to take naps with her and go on walks with her and Murphy. I am not ready to let someone else spend 40+ hours with my baby.

For the next two days we will just do all of our favorite things. We will go to target and spend at least $50, accessorize to our little hearts are content, do some swimming at the pool, paint our nails, take a shushy on the couch together, hang out in the bumbo and bake, and enjoy some nice long walks around the neighborhood. 

I will go to work on Wednesday, puffy-eyed and stuffied nosed. I will choke back my tears when people ask how she is and if I am getting sleep. I will quickly get my work completed  so I can go home and spend uninterrupted time with her and her dad. Here is to being a working mom!

Do great things

Linds